How are you ?

“I am fine” is what most of us say. But are we really? Is it just a polite Question/Answer game?

For the most part it seems people don’t really want an honest answer to that question. I noticed that when I first came to this country. Someone asked me how I was feeling and I started my answer only to  be interrupted. So I realized quickly to just do the polite thing and give the answer that was expected. However, each time I do ask the question and someone answers “just fine” and I ask them “are you really?” more often than not people seem surprised and happy that someone really cares and they will tell me how they feel. Most of the time things are NOT so fine.

On the other hand I was also intrigued by the q/a and the answer of “I am fine” that a lot of times when I do give that answer suddenly I DO  feel fine, even though I may have been in a grumpy mood before.

I am not saying to be “fake”, but next time someone asks you  how you are, think for a moment. And do the same when you ask someone how they are doing and maybe give them  the gift of your presence, listening and care.

Some of my closer friends have picked up on my “concept” without me even really introducing it, but they KNOW that I care and that I really want to know what they are truly feeling and so oftentimes I get an “okay”, “not so good”, or a “medium” as an answer and I know there is something they may want to share. My friends know that they can always tell me how they really feel and I feel honored by their trust. I feel equally blessed when they give me the same gift of letting me share how I truly feel.